From Anxiety to Empowerment: A Coach’s Path to Supporting Trauma Survivors

Introduction

For much of my life, anxiety and worry were my constant companions. Growing up with a mother who suffered from paranoid schizophrenia, I lived in perpetual fear that I would inherit her condition. Coupled with the trauma of childhood sexual abuse and the heavy responsibility of caring for my younger siblings, my early years were filled with immense stress and role reversals. Despite these challenges, I have transformed my experiences into valuable lessons that I now share as a Radiant Coach for trauma survivors.

My Personal Struggle with Anxiety

frank and trudy as kids from anxiety to trauma survivorsUntil the age of 30, I was plagued by the fear that I would end up like my mother. This fear, combined with the traumatic experiences of my childhood, created a deep-seated anxiety that was difficult to overcome. My mother’s condition meant that, often, I had to take on adult responsibilities and care for my siblings, leading to a role reversal that added to my emotional burden.

Reading articles on sexual abuse and understanding the feelings of guilt and hatred associated with it was a turning point for me. Through this learning, I was able to let go of the hatred and guilt that had consumed me, and I began to truly live. However, my journey to overcoming anxiety didn’t stop there. It was only the beginning of a long process of healing and self-discovery.

The Impact of Chronic Illness

During puberty, I began suffering from a painful chronic illness called boils, which was later correctly diagnosed as Hidradenitis Suppurativa (HS). Initially treated with antibiotics, the treatment depleted my immune system, exacerbating my anxiety. This physical ailment added another layer of stress to my already burdened life. However, through reading and adopting a holistic way of life, including organic living, consuming lots of fruits and vegetables, and engaging in regular sweaty workouts, I managed to heal significantly. While HS will never completely go away, it has subsided, allowing me to focus more on my mental and emotional well-being.

The Importance of Challenging Beliefs

One of the most powerful tools I have learned and now teach as a Radiant Coach is the practice of challenging beliefs. This was not something I was taught as a child, but it has become a cornerstone of my approach to managing anxiety and worry. My coaches introduced me to this transformative practice, which has been instrumental in my healing process.

What is Challenging Beliefs?

Challenging beliefs involves questioning the validity of the thoughts and assumptions that fuel our anxiety. Often, we accept these thoughts as truths without examining their basis. By scrutinizing these beliefs, we can identify those that are irrational or unhelpful and replace them with more balanced and realistic ones.

How to Challenge Beliefs

  1. Identify the Belief: Start by identifying the specific thought or belief that is causing anxiety. For example, I often worried that I would develop schizophrenia like my mother.
  2. Examine the Evidence: Look at the evidence for and against this belief. Is there concrete evidence that supports it? In my case, I realized that while genetics play a role, environmental factors and personal experiences are also significant.
  3. Consider Alternatives: Think about alternative explanations or perspectives. Could there be another way to view the situation? I began to see that my mother’s condition did not define my fate and that I had the power to shape my own life.
  4. Test the Belief: Experiment with thinking differently. Replace the irrational belief with a more balanced thought and observe the impact on your anxiety. I started to tell myself, “I am not my mother, and I have control over my mental health,” which significantly reduced my worry.

Moving Forward with Confidence

My journey from a life dominated by anxiety and worry to one of confidence and resilience has not been easy. It has required a conscious effort to challenge and change my beliefs, but the rewards have been immense. Not only have I found peace and stability, but I have also turned my experiences into a source of strength and inspiration for others.

As a Radiant Coach, I now help others navigate their own journeys through trauma, stress, and anxiety. I share my story to show that it is possible to overcome even the most daunting challenges and to live a life filled with joy and purpose.

Conclusion

Anxiety and worry may have been my companions for much of my life, but they no longer define me. By challenging my beliefs and learning to let go of guilt and hatred, I have reclaimed my life and now guide others to do the same. If you are struggling with anxiety, remember that you have the power to change your thoughts and, ultimately, your life. It is never too late to begin living fully and radiantly.